“She Was Always Enough”
As a busy mom of two, I often find myself juggling many roles at once. Caring for my home, ensuring my family eats nourishing meals, working toward my personal and professional goals, and staying connected to my spiritual path—all of it matters deeply to me. Yet there are days when it feels like too much.
What makes it harder is my perfectionism.
For a long time, I wondered where this trait came from. When I finally looked closely, the answer felt both tender and confronting. Like many of us, my perfectionism has roots in childhood—shaped by criticism, comparison, and a constant feeling that I needed to prove my worth. Somewhere along the way, I learned that being “good enough” meant meeting everyone’s expectations, even when they conflicted with my own.
Over time, perfectionism became a survival strategy. A way to feel safe. A way to feel loved. A way to feel in control in a world that often feels uncertain. But after 44 years, I’ve come to understand something important: these tendencies were never a flaw. They were a response.
The Gift of Awareness
The beauty in this realization is awareness.
Awareness that our imperfectly perfect selves are not a failure, but a reflection of lived experiences. Awareness that it is okay—not just acceptable, but human—to be unfinished, evolving, and sometimes messy.
This reflection is dedicated to anyone who has spent years being hard on themselves, withholding love, rest, or compassion in the name of “doing better.” If that’s you, consider this a gentle reminder: now is the time to offer yourself the respect, love, and appreciation you may have been seeking outside of yourself.
As my guru, Grandmaster Choa Kok Sui, often reminded us: you are a divine being—an expression of divine intelligence, divine love, and divine wisdom.
What I Practice When Perfectionism Shows Up
When I notice myself slipping into harsh self-judgment, this is what I consciously choose to do:
- I slow down and turn inward instead of pushing harder.
- I bring awareness to my body, noticing where I am holding tension, unresolved sadness, or anger toward myself.
- I practice forgiveness—for my mistakes, my limits, and my humanity.
- I return to my breath, gently slowing it down and allowing my nervous system to reset.
- I remind myself, with intention: I love every part of me. I release guilt for being who I am.
- I ask for divine support and blessings to cleanse and soften my emotional body.
Perfectionism may still visit from time to time, but it no longer runs the show. Each moment of awareness gives me a choice—to respond with compassion instead of control.
If this resonates with you, know that you are not alone on this path. Healing does not require perfection. It only asks for presence.
